Toilet Ruminations #48

I can not live this life without beer. I have told myself I would not drink for thirty days. It has been eight days and I need a beer. I can not do this anymore. It is ridiculous to deny myself the medicinal influence of a cold micro brew in the summer time. There is little else to do in the suburbs than go and get a beer at a local brewery. There are few other social activities that I want to partake in. I do not want to go out anywhere in the suburbs without the assistance of beer. The people and the places are all dull. It is conservative drudgery which can only be made interesting and tolerable under the influence of beer. The past eight days, without the assistance of beer I have stayed home. Why go anywhere? I need to drink a beer. I can not live this suburban, middle-class life without beer. It is Friday. Enough of this torment. I have been smoking copious amounts of marijuana but it does not satisfy in the same way that beer does. In the same way a man misses the best sex of his life, I miss the beer buzz. It is one of the few places in which I feel happy and excited. I feel warm and stimulated. My inhibitions fall off of me like dead skin. I never experience happiness outside of the beer buzz. Beer is my avenue of happiness. It lasts a short while but so does everything. Life feels renewed under the influence. I feel hopeful again when drinking beer. Why do I deny myself this much needed medicine? Health reasons? When I do drink it I rely on it too much? Probably so, but to hell with it. Live your life. There is no good or bad, right or wrong. We make it up as we go. Ultimately there is no meaning in anything. Everything is a lie that we are telling to ourselves and others. Nothing means a damn thing. We are making up the story as we go. THERE IS NO MEANING. So let yourself enjoy a beer or two. Enjoy the feeling of calm and happiness which bubbles up from the beer buzz. You are never happy without beer so why deny yourself the pleasure you feel when drinking beer. Enjoy the reckless abandon. Let yourself indulge in beer everyone in a while. Lets go.

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