I should not go in this direction. As a psychologist I know better. But I am almost 40. My hair is thinning. My belly is growing larger by the day. I am afraid that my good looks are declining. I am tired of being the nice guy and getting little in return. I spend most of my free time on a toilet ruminating. The world is in great decline. People are growing dumber and dumber. I must act for myself. I must take action or else I will dissolve away into my ruminations. I will exist in a vegetative state. I will fall into my toilet and be flushed down the drain. I do not want to end up in the city sewer. That would be disgusting. I must take action even though I know that it is wrong. If a man does not act upon his rage he will only become a victim of it. I have this new home that I bought which I rarely go to. No one knows that I bought a new home. I bought the home so that I could have my own bathroom to ruminate in without being bothered by my wife. But I do not use the bathroom. I do not use the home. It would be the perfect place to keep someone who I kidnap. I want to kidnap someone. I want to act upon my dislike of people. I want to act upon my lust for another woman. I need to act or I will continue to lose my hair. Several very attractive women come to see me for psychotherapy. They dress seductively in our sessions revealing their legs and the contours of their breasts. They recline on my couch and act very freely. I would like to have sex with several of them. I would like to see several of them in the nude. But as a psychologist I am always very professional. I am always respectful of my clients. But I am tired of being the nice guy. I am tired of being the one who is respectful and eats shit in return. It is time for me to act. I want to kidnap one of these women. I will take her to the empty home that I own. She can stay there for a time. I will make her into my sex slave. I know that this is a terrible thing to do. I know that I need to respect my position as a psychologist but it is time for me to act. Respecting my clients has gotten me nowhere. I have been nice and kind for over ten years and all I have to show for it is some money in my bank and thinning hair. My body has grown weak from listening to all these people’s problems. It is time for me to act. To take back the power. To get what I want. To make someone else eat my shit. I know these are terrible things to say. I know I should not be thinking like this but it is the only logical answer to deal with my rage. I meditate daily but it does not work. It helps but it does not put out the fire. I want a woman as my sex slave. I want to keep her in the nude. I want her to be there for me whenever I want to talk. I will treat her well. Feed her well. Bathe her well and make her as comfortable as I can. But it is time for me to act but not today. Not today. I need to ruminate about this some more before doing anything.