Toilet Ruminations #96

On my daily walks around the park I am continually looking for someone to kidnap. It has become a preoccupation. An obsession. As much as I do not want to think about it, the truth is that I can not stop thinking about it. Continually on the hunt for a very attractive young lady to kidnap. I do not want to kidnap my wife because I am afraid she will bore me. She already bores me. Why would I want to have to spend more time with her? I could gag her and keep her in the nude. She does have a nice naked body. If she is gagged I would not have to listen to her talk. How her articulations bother me. I could just keep her nude and wordless. Use her body as a sexual object. After all this is what women are for me- sexual objects. Objects for me to express my sexual desires upon. Women are majestic creatures whom I idolize. I crave them. I want a woman to humiliate me because she then puts herself at a higher value than myself. Who would not prefer a $50,000 car over a $20,000 car? I could use my wife’s body to freely satisfy my sexual desires. But I do this already. I need someone new. I need a body yet unexplored by me. I need a more perfect body. A body yet deformed by age. A body still fighting against gravity and the inevitable sag. A body still so refined. This is what I am searching for. On my walks I look and look. I have specific standards. She must be in her twenties. She must have a nice ass and breasts. She must be well dressed. She must carry herself well. And if I see an attractive woman who is staring into her smartphone while walking I am immediately turned off. So she must be a young woman not yer soured by her smartphone addiction. The skin on her face must not yet suffer from the continual exposure of the smartphone digital glare. I want this woman! I want her naked and tied up in my tub! I will treat her well. Feed her well. I will of course not harm her but I will make her my sexual object. I will humiliate her just like I have been humiliated. Petty I know but it is the way it is. I do not care what she will say about equality. There is no equality in the natural world. Equality is a concept made up by humans. The truth is women are far superior to men! Men are stupid idiots good for one thing- having sex with women! And women are really only good for one thing- having sex with men. Homosexuality is just some strange deviation I can’t understand. If gay people want to go at it that is fine, but I will never understand it. Makes no sense in my mind. It is like kissing my own image in the mirror. How I abhor people. I abhor you. I abhor everyone I know. I abhor all humans! We are a wretched species. Self-centered and dumb. Greedy and arrogant. Destroying ourselves one minute at a time. All we want from one another is what we can get from one another. We are disgusting creatures. I abhor everyone, including myself. We are all absolute idiots pretending to be positive and happy! How it fills my gut with disgust. As a psychologist I have to listen to these abhorrent creatures everyday. I can not think of a worse affliction. To have to listen to abhorrent human beings day in and day out in order to support my lifestyle. Humans torment me. My parents torments me. My sister torments me. Every woman I have ever loved has cheated on me. My beloved wife deceived me in the worst possible way. Every person I meet is trying to get something from me and I am only trying to get something from them. What despicable creatures we are. Pathetic. Humiliating. Kidnapping is the only logical answer. Nothing else makes sense but to have as much deviant sex as possible while we are alive. To hell with everything else. But I know kidnapping is wrong. I know that it is not the action taken by a healthy mind. Maybe I need to slow down. Breathe in and out. Just relax. Lets think about this some more. Why the hell is kidnapping the only logical answer?

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