Toilet Rumination #106

There is a kind of banality to his thinking. I like his essays but there is banality in them. But maybe there is banality in everything. Maybe no artist or writer escapes from some degree of banality. I am sure there is plenty of banality in what I write. But maybe not. Banality is a personality thing. It is a crisis of soul. It is a simplification of personality. Banality is a depth problem. Often times people are not willing or able to go deep enough to surpass banality. Plus banality sells since most people are looking for art or entertainment that reconfirms their own banality. But I am always looking for art, writing, film and other things which lack banality. Richard Prince’s essays, or what I have read of Richard Prince’s essays, have banality in them. Not totally banal. There is interesting things within these essays, and I will keep reading them for this reason, but the personality writing these essays does suffer some degree of banality. I am sure he would admit to this. Most of our personalities succumb to some degree of banality. I resist this. In continual resistance to the banalization of my personality. Maybe I should give in. Maybe life would be easier if I just let go and surrender to banality. But I continually seek out an absence of banality. I seek it out through drugs, through sex and women, through music and through literature. I am often told that I should meet new people but most meetings with people, if not all, are banal. So I prefer to avoid meeting new people. I prefer to limit my interactions with people (unless they are naked, female and very attractive which does not happen often) because people equal the banal. But I am always seeking out people who are not banal. Artistic expression that is absent of the banal. I come across it not often. I spend a lot of money on books and records hoping that I will find the antidote to the banal in them and often I do not. But sometimes I do and these moments are ecstatic for me. I become very happy because I have hope that it is possible to live without becoming banal. That there are people out there who have forged a way of life and a mode of self expression that omits the banal. Few of them are interested in personal development and yoga. These things have banality built in to them. They lack honesty and integrity. I seek out expression that is fresh and free of all conformity and censorship. People whose personality has not yet been marginalized. These moments are why I continually go to book stores and record stores. Every time I go to a book store and record store there is the slight possibility that I will discover something that provides me with moments of hope and ecstasy. Where the world will not be such a banal place and there is the hope of surpassing this human condition. It is a temporary elation because soon after finishing the book and/or record the hope and the ecstasy dissipate. I will then go in search for someone else, some other artist or writer who has yet to succumb to banality. It is a continual effort on my part to ward off banality and each artist or author whom I find who has avoided the banalization of their artistic expression and personality gives me the hope and courage I need to carry on.

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